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Author Topic: One Last Round  (Read 3926 times)
Kaiu Yosai
Genbu Company of the North
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« on: September 19, 2011, 08:53:51 PM »

Laughter filled the common area of The House of the Falling Blossom. The room was half  filled with crab samurai on their quarterly leave.  The laughter died as a particularly large crab took a seat at table surrounded by men of various size yet all were larger then most and did another round of sake.

“Alright, Yosai-san, your last for stories.” The one who just sat down said after putting his cup down and pointing a meaty finger at a smaller man at the table.”Why don't you tell us about what is with the turtles all of a sudden.” Yosai smiled, nodded then grabbed his turtle motif encrusted cane and used it to lift himself to his feet. He was using it more to keep his sake impaired balance then his usual aid to walk. The table clapped as he took his feet.

Yosai cleared his throat then started. “A couple of months after I went back on duty after losing my leg, I was stationed in Shinsei's Last hope to over see a project in the port. I was standing on the docking surveying when a large sea turtle approached me. I paid it no attention to it as I was involved with my work. It sat there and watched me for awhile. Suddenly there was a lightning strike and sound of thunder and the turtle rose to the sky. I could not believe my eyes, so that night I had myself checked for taint and found no signs.”

“The next day I was standing land side when I was approached by a large man who could have easily made Konyo-san here look like a small child.” Yosai pointed back at the man who pointed to him earlier and looked around before proceeding. “I, who was consumed with my work, payed him no heed till he loomed over me and spoke.

'Why did you ignore me yesterday?' He said to me.

I questioned back, 'I would remember a man of your stature but I do not remember you, are you sure it was me?'

He then calmly said to me but I could easily detect a tinge of annoyance. 'I was that turtle, I had lost a bet and had been forced into that form.' I stared at him puzzled wondering the need to call the Kuni when he continued. 'Anyways I wanted to inform you that I will need to build a better tower for me.' and with that he pointed to a tower on the outskirts. There was another lightning strike and a sound of thunder and he disappeared. A few days later a lightning bolt struck the tower collapsing it. When it was inspected, they found the corpses of several bog hags.”

With that the table burst into laughter as Yosai grabbed at his hat. “You mean to tell me you met Osano-Wo in the form of a turtle,” one of the smaller men who was built for running managed to squeeze in. “That is about believable as the story you told us about how you met your wife!”

“Take it as you will Aki-san,” Yosai said to the man who managed to speak between his laughs. “Well, I need to leave as the wife plans her own special good bye.” He said with a grin.

Konyo finally managed to stop and waved his hand “Wait...wait...Yosai-san, one last round. “He picked up the bottle and promptly began filling the cups of the table. He then held a cup to hand to Yosai.

“Alright, one last one. Any more and I think I would be unable to even find the wall.” Yosai said grabbing the cup.

“To Yosai-san, may he protect the imperials as well he protected us and may he return to the wall one day.” Konyo said before toasting and downing his drink. The rest of table followed suit. Then there was a sound of a thud as the recipient of the farewell hit the floor passed out.

Edit: Split up some of the talking for ease.
« Last Edit: September 19, 2011, 10:19:32 PM by Kaiu Yosai » Logged

Crab Clan | Artisan | Puppeteer | Siege | Tactician | Gunso

Honor: 4.5 Status: 3 Glory: 3

Genbu Company of the North: Gunso

Carries: Daisho, War Fan, Craftsman Tools, Turtle Motif Cane, Turtle Motif False Leg, Smoking Pipe

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Yoritomo Amano
Byakko Company of the West
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« Reply #1 on: September 19, 2011, 09:49:26 PM »

Do I smell a new drinking buddy on the horizon?!
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Mantis Clan * Smarmodon * Excellent Company
Glory: 2 | Honor: Untrustworthy | Status: 1

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Yoritomo Virendra
Suzaku Company of the South
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« Reply #2 on: September 19, 2011, 10:05:04 PM »

Erf ...

While an interesting story, the middle section could stand to be broken up better. Rule of thumb is, if it's a new speaker, a new paragraph is needed. When relaying a story, if you're quoting what the person actually said instead of summarizing, you should also make a new paragraph.

I had to read the middle section a few times to work everything out.
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Kaiu Yosai
Genbu Company of the North
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« Reply #3 on: September 19, 2011, 10:17:14 PM »

Do I smell a new drinking buddy on the horizon?!

You just might be.

Erf ...

While an interesting story, the middle section could stand to be broken up better. Rule of thumb is, if it's a new speaker, a new paragraph is needed. When relaying a story, if you're quoting what the person actually said instead of summarizing, you should also make a new paragraph.

I had to read the middle section a few times to work everything out.

I knew that a new speaker meant new paragraph, I just could not recall if it did as well  when it was the same speaker just repeating what another said to him in a story.
« Last Edit: September 19, 2011, 10:20:47 PM by Kaiu Yosai » Logged

Crab Clan | Artisan | Puppeteer | Siege | Tactician | Gunso

Honor: 4.5 Status: 3 Glory: 3

Genbu Company of the North: Gunso

Carries: Daisho, War Fan, Craftsman Tools, Turtle Motif Cane, Turtle Motif False Leg, Smoking Pipe

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Kitsuki Masakaze
Suzaku Company of the South
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« Reply #4 on: September 19, 2011, 11:44:44 PM »

Fun story and very fitting for a Crab. I look forward to seeing your antics with our company
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Dragon Clan * Samurai * Gunso * Voice * Benten's blessing * Enlightened * Probably playing a prank on you

Honor: What is expected Status: 3 (Gunso) Glory 3.0

Carries: Daisho (Blue and black saya, gold and blue handles), unusual baggy but flowy kimono, armor, green and gold obi, a tea set, sweets, key to the squad 2 sake cabinet.

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Kitsuki Yasuko
Genbu Company of the North
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« Reply #5 on: September 27, 2011, 06:52:42 PM »

Fun and far-fetched story. Cheesy
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Dragon Clan • Courtier • Advisor to Seppun Shin • Imperial • Justicar-wannabe • Knows things you don't • Smells of apricot
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Soshi Karoshi
Genbu Company of the North
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« Reply #6 on: October 02, 2011, 09:00:22 AM »

It's a refreshing, entertaining story, not a one you laugh throughout, but a one you finish reading in good mood. Also showing the advantage of dialogue over third-person description - we can make of Yosai's tale what we want. It also serves its purpose well: introduces interesting facets of the character.

Like!
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Glory: 2 • Status: 1.5 • Honour: Untrustworthy

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Wears: sturdy clothing (maroon & black), light armour, mask, citrus scent, winter cloak (outdoors) • Carries: daisho, jitte, private stuff
Kaiu Yosai
Genbu Company of the North
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Posts: 74


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« Reply #7 on: October 04, 2011, 07:52:26 PM »

I had a bit of inspiration for this story when I was reading some folk tales actually. Figured a it would a nice twist of a crabs view.
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Crab Clan | Artisan | Puppeteer | Siege | Tactician | Gunso

Honor: 4.5 Status: 3 Glory: 3

Genbu Company of the North: Gunso

Carries: Daisho, War Fan, Craftsman Tools, Turtle Motif Cane, Turtle Motif False Leg, Smoking Pipe

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